So now with the countdown trickling down, it’s only 5 days till Ellen and I will be on a plane just like my little stop animation photography to Tenerife. I actually can’t wait to get there. It’s about time I had something to look forward too and boy am I going to enjoy myself while I’m there! In obvious “Quirkycurlsfashion” I shall be posting a few videos before hand, showcasing my outfits that I plan to wear. As you can see from the photo below I have purchased some cute nautical things that I’m excited to showcase. I then shall do a “pack with me” video. As I’ve said in my previous post I shall be taking my GoPro camera with me and videoing most of the holiday, as this is no ordinary holiday. Ellen and myself have had a rough few months and this is a big fat middle finger to everything that’s happened and it’s also to celebrate my 25 years living on this planet. A few of my followers have also said they shall want me to do a live video while I’m there so I shall do that one of the days I’m there. I hardly want to use my phone while I’m there so this will just be a short time. I plan to do this on Instagram so if you don’t follow then get over to my instagram right now and follow me…. @quirkycurlsfashion is the handle. I just want to be there right now. 5 days!
I can’t believe we are already in March. March means it’s my birthday on the 19th, with it being my 25th I wanted to do something amazing. So Ellen and I have only gone and booked a 5 day holiday to Tenerife. It was the spur of the moment thing however, I’m so glad we have. When Ellen spoke to me about Tenerife saying it was somewhere she’s always wanted to go and the reason for this was because of Siam Park. If you’re not aware of what Siam park is well, it’s the worlds best water park. It boasts 15 amazing attractions in different categories. In this video is a snippet of just some of the amazing attractions they have
So once Ellen had told me about this water park and I knew I had to go. Tenerife is always somewhere I’ve wanted to go also but I totally didn’t know about Siam Park. I wanted to go for the reason of just how beautiful it looks on photos. We are staying in a four-star hotel on the north side of the island in Puerto de la Cruz. It is a little out of the way of where we did want to stay but none the less we got an amazing deal for what we’ve got! It may look basic but it’s all we need for the 5 days we are there as we don’t plan to stay in the hotel very much. In addition to this holiday, I have purchased a go pro camera. I’m only allowed to take 10 kilograms of luggage which is going to kill me. So I wanted something compact and small to take with me to do a video and take photos. My phone has no memory so that’s no use and my camera is just too big and bulky. Plus I wanted something waterproof so I can take it to the beach and the water park and show you guys the action. I’m super excited to tap into the travel vlogging side of YouTube.
In addition to this holiday, Ellen and I have also booked an amazing holiday for July. We’ve booked to go to Fuerteventura. A 5* all inclusive holiday in the most beautiful of places…. Club Jandia Princess. It’s the most stunning hotel and setting I’ve ever seen. With this booking, we’ve even scored it cheaper as we paid for the Adults only section of the hotel giving us exclusive access to more of the hotel. With all of our food and drinks paid for it’s going to be one messy holiday, I know for sure. As much as we have everything paid for in the hotel I would love to venture out and see some more of what Fuerteventura has to offer. With only 147 days to go, I’m so excited!
Here is a little video of me talking about the holidays and some extra little things going on in my life too.
When best friends get drunk they totally throw random video ideas for your Youtube. However, this time the girl came through. Ellen has been my friend for some time and we’ve become really good friends in the past few months. She does amazing make-up and she said while doing her make up in the toilets, drunk may I add that she wanted to do my make-up. I said not here or now.. and she was like right okay…. your next YouTube video! I was like yeah let’s do this. So here it is……
So following on from my “New Year, New Me Cliché'” video, I’ve taken the leap and dyed my hair brown. I was getting tired and fed up of my hair looking a mess and it looking like a marble cake with my natural hair colour coming through the roots. I took a trip to my local Salon “Images” in the little town where I live and the lady there was super helpful in dying my hair. It took no more than about an hour to do just the top of my hair as the sides had been cut before she dyed my hair. After I had washed it for the first time and really took in that I had brown hair, I stared into the mirror and just for a second I felt good about myself again. I didn’t realise by just changing the way you look can instantly make you more confident. I super love the colour and here for your eyes is the photo of my coloured hair!
Also following on my from “New Year, New Me Cliché” video, I set a goal to start up a gym. Yesterday Friday the 13th of all days I went with one of my friends to sign up to a sign for 12 months! I was a little nervous because I’ve never set foot in a gym before and seeing all these guys that were like double the size of me was very intimidating. However, we did over an hour work out for “Leg and Bum day” and we’re super excited to go back next week. We’ve set a goal to go at least 3 times a week. Each time we go we shall focus on a different part of the body. Next time will be arm day. I shall be posting an active wear video soon. Most of my active wear was purchased from New Look as these are the only retailer to go down to small sizes for men. I have also purchased a few things from Primark as the fit there seems to be pretty good also. I never in a million years would I thought I’d ever do an active wear video but things change. Here’s a little sneak peek at my in my gym clothes….
So 2016 was a really good year for me but also a really shitty year for me too. I had an amazing time in terms of going to new places I’ve never been before and I met some pretty amazing people that are no longer in my life anymore but the memories I’ll cherish forever. In terms of how shit this year was I really came to a new low with my anxiety and had to have medication to help me through this really low stage. As most of you know too, December was a pretty shit month to top off the year with my break up.
However this turning on the clock to the new year I’ve vowed to myself that I’m making New Year resolutions and sticking to them. Here they are…..
I know this is a day late but I hope everyone had an amazing Christmas.I hope you all had a lovely time with your families and loved ones as much as I did. It’s such a precious thing that we just don’t do often and that’s just sit down and have a meal together full of joy and happiness. For my family it’s been a rough year, so sitting together all being well was just lovely to see that 2016 hadn’t broken any of us. Though I didn’t get many presents, I wasn’t bothered. I was more bothered about people opening their personalised sacks I got them that had lots of presents that I know they would love.
I just want to thank you guys. To everyone that watches my Youtube videos, to people that read my blog and just to the people that show their support and always believe that I can do things. Reading from my last post I really hit a low point on that day. But I am now determined to let all my emotions stay in 2016. 2017 is a new year! Thank you again for all your support, I’m really looking forward to starting a new year and really focusing on my blog and YouTube. Let’s raise a glass to our families, our friends, to happiness within yourself and a new year! Cheers ♥
December really has been a horrible month for me. I’ve not felt myself for a long time now due to my break up and just not feeling good enough. But I still try and go through with things just so I have something to do. I thought I was doing really well until today and a wave of emotion came over me. I crumbled as something was posted to me and it really made me realise that this is final and that is it now. Which made me so upset. All I wanted to do was call, text him or get into my car and just go see him. But I know that wouldn’t do any good or what he would want. It was a good hour or two that I brushed myself off and sat down and made myself think what I could do to try and take my mind off things. I realised I had purchased a super cool background and that I would take some photos of myself to try and prove to myself that regardless of what happens, I should never let anyone dull my sparkle. In doing so I came across this quote: “I can choose to let it define me, confine me, refine me, outshine me or I can choose to move on and leave it behind me” As much as it pains me to leave it behind me, there is just no hope that anything will ever happen. Going into a new year I need to focus on me and what I want. I am strong and I can be strong.
So before I go into talking about the clothes show, there is something I don’t really want to talk about but feel I need to tell you guys. Tom and I have broken up. I don’t want to write or really say much about the break up because it’s between us, but it’s not been an easy 2 weeks for me, he will always hold a piece of my heart and the memories will always stay with me. It’s just such a shame.
So last week I ventured out and went to the clothes show with the lovely Emily Jenkins who was also going through a break up. So it came at a perfect time to let us delve into a world of fashion and music to take our minds off things. In the video I talk about what we got up too and things we did…..
Being nearly 25 in a couple of months I’ve recently been thinking of things and how my life would have been if I had done things a little differently in my teenage years. When you’re young you are oblivious to adulthood responsibilities and don’t listen to your parents because you never think you’ll get to that age of responsibilities. You just think ” Oh I will do this but when I’m older” but before you know it that time comes knocking very fast. Here are some of the things I wish I could have told my teenage self all those years ago:
Saving money is more important than you think – This is one of the many reasons I wish I really had listened too. Being young you always are aware of people judging one another on how they look, who has the latest phones and so on. So whatever money you had you spend. I can remember I was one of those people. When I got money I felt I had to spend it as it was something of a luxury, I had to get the latest clothes or put it towards a latest phone or gadget that was out at the time. I had a paper until I was 16, which only made me £9 a week but if I had saved that over the 5 years maybe as little as £5 a week for 5 years I would have had at least £1300 by the age of 16, it’s something to start putting towards for a house or something along those lines, that would have been without Christmas tips as well. When I turned 18 I got my first job, again I never saved because I had more money than sense. I was able to spend, spend, spend. Looking back it was stupid of me not to put money away and instead worry about not having the latest gadget, I should have thought about my future.
Your parents aren’t out to get me – When you’re a 16-year-old and your parents won’t let you out to a party or let you do something you want to do, you feel your whole world is crushed and that they are out to get you. But in fact, your parents aren’t out to get you but instead are there to protect you and think what’s best for you. I was a vile teenager to my parents. I was always trying to be rebellious and because of being gay and not out I had so many things in my head to try and contend with. I used to shout till I had no voice with my parents and for what? I never got my own way so why did I bother? It’s only when you get older you realise how much your parents have done for you. They brought you into this world and want nothing but the best for you. My Mom and Dad have gone through a lot with having 3 children. They’ve brought us up with manners and respect and for that, I’m very grateful for.
Don’t be afraid to be different, embrace your quirks – From a young age, I knew I was different. Being gay was one of the reasons but other than that I knew I was different. Being a very creative, loving style and having lots of friends that were girls. I was put in a shell and too shy to do anything. I didn’t want to embrace that I was different, I didn’t want to do the things I wanted to do like textiles or anything to do with fashion because I was worried people would hate on me. I didn’t want to wear the clothes I wanted because I was scared people would laugh at me or say horrible things. Instead of doing this I should have taken the step and been bold and made sure I was I embraced being different. I’ve learned that now that being different is an amazing and rewarding thing. I shouldn’t of worn clothes that I didn’t really want to wear just to please others, instead of I should have dressed to depress. You’re different and you should embrace that no matter what, you will only see those people around school who taunt you for a few years whereas you see yourself every day… so just be you!
Don’t be so hard on yourself – Every teenager I’ve ever known always put themselves under so much pressure. Getting good grades at school, trying to combat the dreaded outbreak of spots, trying to get that one person to notice you, trying to make sure your voice is heard in the crowd of friends, making sure you’re not perceived as being boring because you don’t do what the other kids are doing. Just stop. You’re okay. Every teenager goes through this and you shouldn’t beat yourself up about it. You’re doing your best with grades, sitting exams aren’t your thing but that doesn’t mean you’re stupid. So what if you have a spot? You shouldn’t let that get you down, every teenager gets them at some point. Don’t make them feel like you’re ugly or not good enough just because of your hormones. With trying to get that one person to notice you.. don’t waste your time. He clearly was just as confused as you were. Let people chase you, not the other way round. The group of friends you’re with through school might not last forever. So don’t do things just to try and impress them if it makes you look like a horrible person. Lastly so what if you’re perceived as boring at least you’re not being called the bike of the year. Just don’t stress kid you’ll be fine!
You should have got help for your anxiety – Anxiety was and sometimes to this day the bane of my life. You will always worry and stress over the little of things and sometimes it influenced big decisions in my life. I’ve lost out to many jobs because of my anxiety and all because I was scared to take medication for it. I thought I was strong enough to battle it on my own but little did I realise just how bad it would get till I hit my 20’s. Doctors are there to help you and to find a solution to your problems. All of the panic attacks and making yourself very ill was for nothing, as every situation you worried about never happened anyway.
Don’t let people walk all over you – You’re a very nice person and always think of others before yourself. You’re going to have a lot of people in your life that will neglect this and walk all over you. Stand up for who you are and what you want. If you don’t want to do something, then don’t do it. You don’t like something, you don’t have to like it just because someone else does. Friends come and go but you will always stay true to who you are. If people don’t like the decisions you make, then that’s their loss. You don’t have to be molded to something you’re not just to fit into a group of friends or for a boyfriend. Nobody should ever dull your sparkle.
Love the body you’re in – All teenagers struggle with always trying to keep up appearances. Put the straighteners down and let your curly hair rock, you come to love it someday and it’s a part of who you are. Yes you’re thin but it’s your metabolism, don’t let people get you down because of that. I know you have a tough time when you’re around 15/16 but don’t let that define who you are, you beat it and yes it doesn’t always go away but you beat it! You don’t need a nose job, your face was just growing at a smaller rate than your nose was. As for your teenage acne, it fades eventually and you have amazing skin! You were too hard on yourself and you didn’t need to be. You were growing up and like any teenager wanting to strive for perfection. Ignore those adverts. You are you and that’s all that matters! Everyone is different in that retrospect so don’t worry!
Believe in yourself – No matter what people say to you, you can do what you want. When people put you down at your hopes and dreams they are just insecure about their own dreams and hopes. Don’t let people taunts and laughs tell you otherwise. Follow your dreams and good things will happen.
That boy who broke your heart wasn’t love – You’ll come across a boy who you think was amazing and perfect. 4 years you will put into this relationship. You will put your life and soul into the relationship but it isn’t meant to be. It wasn’t your fault either. You will think everything is perfect, but all isn’t as it seems. You stayed true to yourself the whole way through that relationship, right till the end. As much as you were heartbroken and you felt your world fell apart you get through it. You find who you truly are, and are actually allowed to express yourself properly instead of being suppressed because of what he said and this is where you love of fashion was born. Your fashion blog was born. A change of image and you were on top of the world. You forget about him and find someone truly amazing a year later, who defines the mean of love. He might have the same name but by no means is he the same.
Have fun while you’re young – You’re young so go and have fun, instead of staying in your room. You’re entitled to go have fun. You have no responsibilities so while you can enjoy it because things get tough when you become and adult.
The wedding has taken place and wow what an amazing wedding it was. I’ve never laughed and danced so much in my entire life!
Myself, Tom, and his family arrived at bang on half 2, where we were welcomed with a drink of our choice and the sun beaming down on the courtyard of the wedding venue, Pembroke Lodge. I went around saying hello to most of Tom’s family and just basking in the sunshine as it was such a hot and beautiful day. Lots of photographs were being taken by the photographer as well as family and friends. After we had a mingle and a little chat to most of the guests it was time to witness the wedding. In a beautiful little room on at the back of this beautiful manor house, I was sat on the right hand side with all the groom’s family, which made it so surreal for me. It made me realise I was a part of a family that was so lovely and so genuine. I really loved the warm feeling I had sat watching these two people who I had never met before exchanging their lovely vows. As they were reading out their vows I held Tom’s hand and I had this overwhelming sensation to cry because I was just filled with so much love for the boy sat next to me whom I’ve spent nearly 10 months of my life with. After the ceremony it was time to head back into the sunshine to have drinks and canapés. While this was happening the photographer was taking the bride and the groom off to have their wedding photography taken as well as this the venue was setting up for the sit down meal. A few more drinks went down before we sat down for a our 3 course meal. The seating arrangements got both families sat at a table with different people from each of the families present. Which I thought was a really good idea to get the families to interact with one another. The food was lovely, and this is coming from someone who is a very fussy eater. As well as the food the drink was still flowing and by this point it was slowly starting to take over my head a little. Once the speeches were over and the food had gone down it was time for the last course out on the courtyard in the sunset so the venue can get ready for the dance floor and live band. The bride and Groom were now ready for their first dance and it was such a lovely dance that they shared. It then lead to people coming onto the dance floor and people were up and dancing. When I had a little more to drink I was also up and dancing. The night went on till the stroke of midnight were it was time to say our Goodbyes and return back to the hotel for a long awaited sleep.
Early morning came and we were hangover free! It was time to get ready and get prepared for a lovely breakfast down by the river in Richmond with the newly weds and their family. Serving a full English and sat around chatting to family members was a perfect way to end the events of the first wedding I’ve been too.
I can’t express how much of a lovely time I had being with such a lovely family. Most of all spending time with my beautiful boyfriend. I can’t express how much love I have for him. I kept finding myself gazing at him whenever he was talking to his family and realising just how lucky I really am. Just how amazing this boy who has stuck it out with me for all these months knowing how much rubbish times I’ve been through. How much down days I’ve had with my medication and just in general. I know it’s early days but one day I hope it’s us on the other side of the wedding. Going off and having our wedding photography, sharing memories of each other in our speeches and just spending the rest of our days together.